Oh No. It’s "That" Time of Year

You’ve read enough about me to know the free Grand-Slam breakfast from Denny’s didn’t tempt me in the least. You know I laugh in the face of ice cream, stay strong in the presence of breadsticks, and faithfully bring my own salad dressing to every restaurant. I can even say no to peanut butter!

Knowing that, you probably (naturally) assume that I stand my ground around food pushers, too. Normally I can and do. But I have a confession to make. There is this one, small (and I mean small) exception – perky 8-year-olds wearing green sashes lined with hobby, cooking, camping, and first aid badges.

Yes, I’m talking about…

…Girl Scouts.

Just when I feel safe and a little smug for having successfully navigated the holiday food land mines, girls all over our neighborhood will soon descend on my house like pack wolves. Nice, friendly girls whose eyes, if you look close enough, turn hypnotic yellow and before you know it, you’re writing out a check to troop 549 and wondering if you can write off your (embarrassingly large) cookie purchase on your taxes. Doesn’t happen to you? I guess it’s just me, then.

It’s a sickness. A sickness, I tell you. If eating Thin Mints was an Olympic sport, I’d be the Michael Phelps of cookie consumption and endorsed by every bakery in this country. I’ve been in Thin Mint recovery for five years now, but back in the old days of eating with abandon, you could eat my Peanut Butter Sandwiches, Shortbreads, DoSiDos and Trefoils, but you didn’t come between me and my Thin Mints.

I used to hide them deep in the freezer or under my bed like a drunk hides his vodka in the toilet tank. My mouth would salivate just thinking about their crispy texture and minty taste. (Oh who am I kidding with “would.” It still does!) Just the smell was (probably still is) intoxicating, like a fine wine. If I’d been given a choice between licking chocolate frosting off a naked George Clooney or being thrown naked into pit with only a sleeve of Thin Mints for sustenance, the mints, sadly, would win.

I read today on CNN that the economic downturn has hit the Girl Scout cookie business and that they’re putting two to four fewer cookies in each box this year. Five years ago I’d have responded like a conspiracy theorist, wondering if it meant Thin Mints would be extinct next year. I’d have panicked and worried I’d be left with just Keebler Grasshoppers, a nice try of a cookie, but no comparison to my beloved Thin Mints. I’d have ordered a few extra boxes, just in case, hoarding them like Today Sponges and wondering if anyone out there was Thin Mint worthy.

Thin Mint recovery is difficult this time of year, to be sure. There are many foods that I purposely don’t eat, but would if the time was right and I’d be comfortable knowing when to say when. Thin Mints, all kidding aside, are truly an addicting food to me, something I really have to stay away from. While I’m fairly confident that I would say no to them if offered, I know I’d play a torturous mind game of “If I don’t eat dinner tonight…” or “Oh, just one, PLEASE, Lynn?!” like I’m some kind of puppy. Having them around the house or debating eating just one isn’t worth it.

However, if George Clooney were to call…thanks to five years of Thin Mint sobriety, I’m pretty sure I’d find him Thin Mint worthy.

27 thoughts on “Oh No. It’s "That" Time of Year

  1. The devil created Thin Mints. That’s the only thing that explains their power. 🙂I once bought two boxes, and kept them in the way back of the freezer so I couldn’t see them. They lasted me months, cause I would forget they were there. And how nice they are frozen.Oh, man. Help me, Lord, not encounter a Girl Scout this month. the Princess

  2. I won’t say how many boxes I ordered. But I have a plan. Most of the boxes will stay at the office – in my partner’s office or break rooms. He loves Girl Scout cookies and who am I to deprive him? He’ll help me keep from gorging on them.

  3. I feel exactly the same way about the peanut butter sandwich cookies. I would eat a whole sleeve at a time dunked in milk. I haven’t bought any since I started this journey, nor will I this year because they will call my name from the pantry until they are all gone. The only thing I disagree with you on, is picking cookies over George. Ha! Ha! He is one treat I could never pass up!! LOL

  4. I love love love the Girl Scout cookies with the coconut (I have no idea what they’re called), I’m not such a fan of the Thin Mints. But that said, I am able to eat just one and then leave them alone (until the next day when I’ll have just one).As I continue on this journey to lose 30 stubborn pounds, I know what my problem is. It is that 1. I need to pay more attention to eating between meals and 2. Just because I exercise it doesn’t mean that I can eat with abandon.

  5. I used to hide my secret stash of Thin Mints around the house too. I could eat a whole box in one day, easy. I haven’t thought about them in a while. I would also eat a 1 lb bag of peanut or peanut butter MM’s in one or two days. WHAT was I thinking!!?? Those were more my addiction foods, but Thin Mints were up there too. Glad those days are over! BTW, from another post, my Walmart stopped carrying Oikos and now it’s back after 4 weeks or so, so maybe there’s hope?

  6. BTW, forgot to add this to my last comment…I have been eating Oikos if I have no other choice, second is Fage, but my premium pick is Voskos, with 140 calories, 24 g protein, fat free and only 8-9 g carbs!! Now if Whole Foods could just keep it in stock I’d be happy. 🙂

  7. We had to buy from two little girls because the second one came out in the freezing rain. Now who could say no to that? So I’ll be the proud owner of 4 boxes of Thin Mints. I’m so glad I married a choco-holic so that I won’t have to eat them all. Not to mention your other daughter has staked her claim on a box for herself. She can enjoy it! I remember the days of the Thin Mints running amok in the house! Oh sweet delicious memories!

  8. I’m both stunned and proud that I haven’t eaten a single GS cookie this year. And this is especially amazing (at least to me) since I’m selling them. No, I’m not 8, nor female, nor sporting a green sash. But, you see, I have this <>daughter<>…I’m the cookie pusher at work and sit day after day, week after week, surrounded by cookies. I’m with Debra above: the peanut butter sandwich cookies are my thing. It was all I could do last week to not rip open one of those boxes and just be done with it.

  9. I join the choir of voices that are totally able to relate to this post. This year, I am resolved to make a donation to the girls who show up at my door and not buy the cookies. I cannot buy a box without opening it and devouring it. We’ll see how my will power holds up. Peanut butter cookies are my downfall. Love the post from your favorite daughter!

  10. Every year my husband buys boxes and boxes of Girl Scout Cookies. Every year I warn him not to buy them again. This year, I told him he could buy them but he would have to keep all of the boxes at work. I hope that works!Stacey

  11. Oh no! I hadn’t even thought about GS cookies. How could you….sniff sniff. Luckily, I would have to seek out Girl Scouts in my town so I will keep physically far away from the beloved Thin Mints. But mentally? Now that’s another story 🙂

  12. I guess because I was a bluebird when I was little, that I have always been prejudiced against girl scout cookies. Good for me, one less temptation in this world. But do you remember the mint patty candy that the bluebirds sold? THAT’S what I could still eat a box of, if I could find them!

  13. I hear you! And I justify it to myself saying I’m helping out the girls, just liked people helped me for years! This year I ordered some from an out of state friend and told her to just give them away!

  14. I too have an addiction to Thin Mints! I can remember many times eating an entire sleeve in one sitting. I have 2 nieces who sell GS cookies. I only buy the Peanut Butter Patties for my sons and for some reason I can pass on those!

  15. I can’t help but think… doesnt that relate to the other blog post about being able to “bend”? And not being so rigid. I dont get how one feels smug either? Maybe I dont get it and perhaps being too literal.

  16. Anonymous, I’m a work in progress. Do I always bend? No. Am I always rigid? No. Can I have a GS Thin Mint without wanting more? No. I’m not sure I get where you’re going with your posts. If you know me personally, you know how to get ahold of me and I suggest you contact me. If you don’t, keep in mind this is a blog and not my entire thought process. Are you being too literal? Probably.

  17. um no I dont know you or how to contact you. Im not trying to get anywhere with my post. Just posting. I read several weight loss blogs and some go deep and some are just random thoughts. I guess Im just a deep thinking person on weight loss and I am a work in progress too. So maybe I just shouldnt be so “literal” and just read all blogs as random thoughts. PErhaps that’s a better way to read them

  18. Anoymous, forgive my paranoia. Being “out there” like this in a blog (particularly in this type of format) I tend to get a little protective of my point of view. I’m open to criticism (which you could probably debate since I’m responding to this comment – lol), but I know in my blog (and I’m only speaking for myself and not other bloggers I read), I tend to write off the cuff. I’m thoughtful, don’t get me wrong, but how I feel and act one day may not be exactly the way I feel or act the next day. Anyway, what I mean is this: we are all works in progress. We might want to be one way yet we behave another. I like this forum because I get a chance to express those day-to-day feelings related to weight loss and maintenance, which is rarely ever consistent. I hope this makes sense. I’m glad you read my blog and I hope I didn’t make you feel attacked because that certainly wasn’t my aim. I just get a little paranoid sometimes.

  19. Makes total sense. Of course you should be protective of your thoughts. THis is your space. No worries. Your very gracious for explaining.

  20. I usually agree with every word you write but not this time. Cookies over George Clooney…you are your own there:-)I felt like a real heel the other day when the little GS stopped me outside Walmart to sell cookies…I told her sorry, no thanks and quickly ran away. I have offered in the past to give a donation but not buy a box because once I get it home I will tear it open. Someday, I hope to be strong enough to walk away from the box.

  21. Lynn I’m sorry to say that I’d have to go for the chocolate on George Clooney. Yummy! How could you resist that? Actually, the only reason I could is because I don’t like the Mint Girl Guide cookies at all. Believe it or not, I can even pass up chocolate, not because I am strong or anything, but because I’d rather eat carbs, but the carbs would have to wait if the chocolate came with George.Keep up your blogs … you make me laugh. I love them.

  22. Okay, ladies, I hate to shatter your dream of licking frosting off of George Clooney (thanks, sis), but there is a theory that George Clooney is gay. But, hells yeah, give me the Thin Mints! I’ve had two people at work already send emails out to the greater school community wondering if people want to order. I’m holding out for the girls who stand outside our local grocery store selling the cookies, but they haven’t even appeared yet…I’m starting to worry!

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