Chicago Thursday Morning

Sorry I didn’t get to blog yesterday. I was busy all day being driven around in a limo to rehearsals and fittings and hair and makeup and nails. (That’s not a sentence I expect to write again in my life.) Fortunately the only thing that got waxed were my eyebrows. Whew!

There was an Oprah sighting when I was getting my makeup on. She was on her way to the studio to interview 100 Osmonds. Of course I missed it. So did Shari. Oh well. Today I’ll hug her for real (and Bob Greene, too) and that’s better than just seeing her from afar.

The Harpo powers picked the black/grey tight jeans combo for me to wear on the show. They said they want me to be their “rocker chick.” I hope they realize I’m 44 years old and a grandmother.

I’ll also wear a big studded belt that costs more than my entire wardrobe on any given day and knee-high suede boots. The shirt is off-the-shoulder and my bra straps show which feels really awkward because my mother always told me to never show your bra strap in public. Sorry Mom.

I didn’t recognize myself after they were done styling my hair and putting on makeup. I was a bit shocked actually. The reflection in the mirror was pretty, but it wasn’t me. Dina the hairstylist with two assistants (one of whose job is merely to hand her combs) blew my hair straight and ran a flat iron through it. No one would ever guess I had curly hair. They did the same thing to Cathie and Kelly and Tori, all of whom have curlier hair than me.

The makeup they use for camera is thick and I looked like a cadaver. That’s disconcerting all its own. I couldn’t get the mascara off my eyes before I went to bed last night and my eyeballs were glued to the insides of my eyelids this morning. I’m definitely stopping at Walgreens when I get back to Pennsylvania today and buy a bottle of makeup remover. 

I know I’m supposed to have fun with this whole process, but the makeover kind of messed with my head. It’s like when I was 300 pounds, I still felt like the same person inside but I didn’t look like myself. Now when I finally feel and look like the same person, my look totally changes. I’m still the same person, but the outside doesn’t match the inside. I think I’ll bring my curls back on Friday.

I also think I think too much.

I’ll write when I get home and am in comfy clothes and my face is breathing again. I’ll also be sure to write a blog when I know the day the show will air. Most likely it will be later this month or December.

Thanks for reading and for all your support this week. You’ve helped me stay connected to the real me.

5 thoughts on “Chicago Thursday Morning

  1. Don’t fret too much about the make up. You know those TV types. Your face is only a palette You are and always will be my pesky little sister from Minnesota. I know you won’t read this until after you’re home but I’m sure you’ll do well and I look forward to seeing the show. Let’s chat when you are ready. Love you lots.

  2. That’s Dana’s favorite part about doing TV – THE MAKEUP! He loves it – and I’m really not kidding! It is kind of gross they have to put so much on, but it is what it is. Can you even imagine how Oprah feels having to have her makeup done like that EVERY day?! Yuck! I also agree with big sister that you are just a blank canvas for them to do their art because, after all, stylists are artists in their own right. It has nothing to do with you not being pretty as you are, it’s just their job to make you look totally different for that “shock” effect. But, hey, I like the sexy, bangs in your eyes look – you can have that hairstyle when you wear your “Foxy Grandma” shirt I’m gonna buy you! LOL!

  3. i effing LOVE bob greene. SERIOUSLY. the straight hair is awesome and makes you look about 30. i’m totally supporting it. loveyoumissyoutalktoyousoon. k

  4. Welcome to my world, mascara is my best friend. That’s the problem with Clarion County – no one gets dressed up to go to Walmart!! Maybe they should. So what if you are a grandma – rock it!!! You are going to look great and the straight hair is killer and will make you look even thinner!

  5. Oh my god!! I’ve been wallowing in a mess of thyroid stuff and chubbiness and kids who won’t remember to turn their homework in, and I totally missed that this was coming! YOU ROCK. I wish I knew you IRL, because you’re already pretty much one of my idols:) I only hope they wait to air the episode until I’m done working and can plop in front of the TV at Oprah time –
    how flipping cool is THIS??

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